Saturday, August 28, 2010
i hate the fact that things have changed now. how time flies, we've been together for 20 days. i hope it'll last longer than that. 20 weeks? 20 mths? 20 years? or till eternity? i love him very much. just too much, im becoming more & more obssesive & possessive each day. im not sure if this is healthy. but yeahh, this is how i feel. i hate the fact that i love him so freaking much. everything i do... i will alwaes think of him. i dont know bout him, but i juz want him so badlyy by my side. i hate him but i love him. he made me go crazzyy. like seriously crazyy, even sometimes... especially today, i cant focus on my work! its good but its badd. if you know what i mean. i know it is bad... but what can i do? he told me to not hate him but love him only. hows that possible? so i told him, if he could make me not think of him when im studying & i swear i would only love him. guess he couldnt? soooo.... wad can i do? i juz love him anywayy.p/s : isit juz me being irritable today? or am i the one who is irritating? tell me. i dont know lah okay? feeling shitty right now.
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Thursday, August 26, 2010
heyy. idk why im posting when i dont have mch to talk about... but ironically, the one who said blogger is soooo last few years ago... was the one who asked me to post! wonder what that person wants in life huh? hahhah! ;P well, life's been super duper great... bcoz of somebody. but at the same point of time, there's other issues that makes me pressurized. seriously, im telling you.. i dont & i cant organize my time well & im sorry if what im doing currently... make you guys feel i've forgotten bout you people already. sometimes i admit, im so into my r/s till i dont spend alot of time wit you guys anymore. but i do caree okay. you guys have to tell me if you think im not fair or anythink. dont juz keep quiet. i wont know! unless during lessons i sit wit you guys & ask hows your lives. hahhah! so far... nisa, not so huh? thats why juz now you said like that right? anw, sorry huh. you should know why im like this... when i have home, O LEVELS, friends & a lovely boyfriend to think of. im not saying its such a burden though. dont get so paranoid huh? ;Pp/s : & plz, baby.. im not saying that you're drifting me away from my friends. its me. my choice. its not your fault. i want to to prove to you that im really serious this time & im sooooo gonna do juz anythink to make you believe me. hack care what my dad think of you!Labels: its brighter than sunshine...
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Monday, August 23, 2010
its Monday & i hateee it! got back prelim papers - chem P1 & P3, combined humanities & maths. it SUCKS BIG TIME! what can i do?? im left with... like 8 weeks? 8 FREAKING WEEKS to the BIG O LEVELS!! & here i am... not doing anythink at all, not panicking! all this while... what have i been studying? mum sees me coming back late... went for night study... but my prelim results still shitty! i dont want my parents to look at my prelim results! i dont want to hear them nag! i hate people nagging! NOOOO..... is there still time for me? i feel so hopeless right now... i feel like giving upp, yeapp2... AT THE VERY LAST LAP of the race... im breaking down slowly... i see no point studying if i keep failing! i tried okayy! I TRIED! since march... to MYE... to prelim! still the sameee! URGGGHHHH!! why cant i be one of those smartasses? those who can absorb things very easily? my head feels like exploding any moment... im afraid. im soo afraid to look at my other prelim papers. i dont want to see the prediction results for O levels. i dont want to know that i might be landing myself in ITE. NOOOO..... i will never ever step my feets in an ITE! NEVER! even so, i would rather go SHATEC, NAFA or LASSELLE. or take private O's again? urghhh! i dont know! i juz dont want to go ITE! plz gawd! please help meeee! i need youu right now! plz guide me to right path... pleaaaassseeeee!Labels: i thank youu for being there alwaes... i love you dearest.
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Sunday, August 22, 2010
Each and every day, I try to make some sense of this What YOU mean to me, I know it could be serious Each and every night, I dream about just holding YOU Wanting YOU like this, what is a girl supposed to do? I love YOU... I want YOU... YOU're the one that I live for... And I can't take it any more! What can I do to make YOU see YOU're the only one for me?
My heart only belongs to YOU...
Labels: baby you drive me crazzyyy....
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Friday, August 20, 2010
hello ;) at last its FRIDAYY! & prelim's dooneee! d&t too! but seriously, im not satisfied wit my work. actually i was... UNTIL.... she had to make comments! i was already rushing for time & there she was being fussy! we started work right away aft sci paper ard 9.45? imagine that time aaaaaallll the wayyy to 6pm! none stop worrrrkkk! by the end of the day i was alr too exhausted to staybck wit hym for art. THANKS! =.= however at bout 6.20pm i went down to meet hym also lahh. ;DDis it normal for someone to be obsessed & possessive over somebody who they like or love very mch? even if it meant that, that someone wants to like control somebody's life just to make sure that somebody doesnt cheat on someone? but it seems impossible right, if that somebody is so truthful & sincere? so why in the first place... that someone has to feel that wayy? why? bcoz someone feel threaten or whatnot having to know that there's others that have feelings for somebody too isit? but isnt that somebody belonged to someone already? so why bother? why care bout others? all you've got to think bout is the two of you! ;))Labels: ohh crappp...
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Thursday, August 19, 2010
tmrw is science MCQ prelim paper 1 & im not in the mood to studyy. i'd rather do my d&t. but overall, i dont feel like doing anythink at all. grrrrrrrr!! saturday after buka need to go somebody's hse for smth & i really dont wanna go! dah lah dari pagi sampai petang ade CIP flag dayy! URGHH! i dont wanna see that person's face also!! irritating pest! i'd rather stay at home & help granny make kuih layang2 lahh... ;(( baby, please help meeeee! im scared! i dont wannttt! ;'( can i give a very good excuse?? why i can get away from it last time but not this time? shheesshh! damnn youu! BENCIIIIII !!!!!!!!Labels: alwaes remember that i dont like you, i LOVE you. i only need you.
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Wednesday, August 18, 2010
time is FLYYYYYYIIINNNGGG SUPER FAST!! the next thing i knew was, its alr the ending of the week! prelim's about to be donee in 2 daes! WOAAAHH. idk wad to say bout my prelim results uh. wads important is gonna be my O's anyway... hmph. this saturday have to do CIP! its gonna be for 5hrs from 11am to 4pm! plus we're fasting somemore... i bet it'll be a very tiring dayy! haiyaaa... && ohhh! i got backk my MT O LEVEL results today.. syukur alhamdullilah i got A1! its very shocking for me coz i wasnt expecting for it! ;) everybody was calling their parents but i juz stood there. wads the use anywayy? she said im trying to attract their attention? im deprived of their attention? NO WAYY. i don need it. thank you very much. well, i dont even think they remember today is the day im gettin back my results anywayy... so im juz gonna keep quiet & see who is the first one to ask me. see who really care about me...
p/s: friends, sorry didnt tell you peeps bout my r/s. ika dared us not to tell anyone. but OBVIOUSLY we couldnt. & it was TOO OBVIOUS. hahhah! we didnt care anywayy. we're finee wit you guys knowing. ;)
Labels: plz dont make me so worried bout you plz... ily...
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Monday, August 16, 2010
someone, CAN I PLEASEE BANG MY HEAD ONTO THE WALL ??nobody appreciates me right? all my efforts have gone down the drain.... all the work ive done, somebody else gets the credits righttt..... so might as well i bang my head onto the wall right now! when they need something, they find me. treat me nicely... but when they dont, dump me elsewhere. criticise me! CRAPPPPPPP!!!!! i hate my freakinggg lyfe OKAEE?? to start off, i dont even love myself! i hate looking in the mirror! i hate eveythink bout myself! i hate the genes i have in me, which is mostly from YOU! i hate it! urrggghhhh!!Labels: feel like listening to indies songs....
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Sunday, August 15, 2010
my mind's in a mess. i seriously need to do smth to get rid of it! wads worse is that ive not been following my timetable for 3 daes straight & now ive to payback to study chem! gggrrrrr!!! must finish upp d&t presentation board somemore... *sob! sob!* somebodddyyyy!! plz save my lyfe! its 71 days to O LEVELS but i still suck at maths & science! damnnn it! urrrgggghhhh! i regret for slacking so mch last yr.... u're really dumb dee! feel like banging my head on the wall.... everybody wants me to do well. well, who doesnt right? they say it as though its so easyy, but do they know what am i facing? nopee right? what should i do? chase after tchers for consultation sure doesnt help me AT ALL. should i register for intensive tuition at aspire hub? urrgghh.. idk lah kaee... i juz need to sleep now. nyte2 peeps.Labels: i know you hate me getting stressed upp, im sorry.
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Saturday, August 14, 2010
its 11.13am & i dont know what to do. mum said they wanna go out to shop for raye heels since baju raye is done on the checklist. ;D thinking back...tmrw's maths ppr 2 & ive to fnsh upp my d&t! grrrrr.... of course there's a part of me that would rather shop! but the other half says "come on dee, sgp is juz a lil red dot! you can go anywhere you want right aft o's.. now you go study first!" everything else can wait right?? okaee, i agree wit this part. ;DD im sooo not gonna follow them then. guess i'll either study at home alone or go out ltr study wit someone. hee. hope mum doesnt nagg. im really gonna study kaee. ;PP no hanky panky. no menggatal, seriously. hahhahh! cheeky mum! its a wonder how mothers tend to predict & know things that they're not supposed to know! but the best part is that... she doesnt mind me talking bout BGR stuffs at all now! last time she used to nagg like hell... but not is juz like merely teasing or asking qns... lol! im soo loving it too! ;D the same goes for daddy! last night aft shopping at mustaffar we went for supper. lol. but i juz drank bandung. & the next thing i knew was me & dad talking bout friends that can be trusted & those who are just making use of us. then... we ended upp advising bro bout hym mixing wit the right group of people. mum juz sat there listening to us & at the end she said, ur sis have gone all these stages in life & now she's matured enough to understnd these things already. so you've got to listen to her. hees. at that point of time i feel soo old! LOL. ohh well, im juz lovin my family even more! i love my click of frens too! & of course i love that special SOMEONE. hahahh! Labels: i missing you like crazzyyy.....
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Friday, August 13, 2010
hey there! ;) its FRIDAAYY & im SOOO freakinnngg relieved! hehehh! at lastt... tmrw aft sahur i can go back to sleep! ive been using the time to revise for prelim & that sucks. juz have to endure for another 5 days & i can go back to sleep aft sahur! LOL! anywayyys, hows things ppl? any broken hearts healed? any problems solved? if you've anythink to say, plz get straight to the point & tell me yeah? dont wait for me to ask you.. you know i ask you.. coz i might juz be too busyy to ask. hehh! no lahh, not really.. :P its 5.13pm now.. should be gettin ready for night study.. cant wait to meet someone! lol. shhhh! im fastingg! hahah! but then... still waiting for bibik salmah to send food for buka & have to iron dad's uniform... urggghh! stresss! =S okaeeeee, someone's at the door. must be bibik salmah! im gonna get it noww & get ready for night studyy! toodles! ;PLabels: i lovvveee you so muchhhh i wanna diiieeeee...
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Monday, August 9, 2010
hello thereee! ;) its 9.41am & i bet you guys are still sleeping coz its such a nice weather to sleep right? hahahh! well, too baddd i cant enjoy my sleep like you guys do.. coz somebody juz disturbed my sleep! HEES. ;PP that person should know lahh who im refering to... hahahah! im so meeaann right? BUT...BUT that person is a BADDDIIEEE! LOL! XD its been such a longggg time since i updatedd. i dont even know what to say alreadyyy. well, my current lyfe... has been great? but at the same time its hectic too! ;(( too many DEADlines to meet.. & too many things to studyy! i hope all this will go very fast & soon enough its already mid november! i wanna enjoy lyfe like i used to AGAIN. be happy-go-lucky AGAIN! dont have to think so much bout studies alreadyy. QUICK! NOVEMBER COME QUICK! =SLabels: saranghae...you simply melt my heart.
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Sunday, August 1, 2010
im still waiting... & waiting... & waiting... for the call from NGEE ANN! im sooooo NOT gonna believe i dont get thru it! my frens get it, why cant i? i swear to god, if i get it... i'll work my ass off juz to get good grade! i really will do juz that! it'll be motivation to do well academically! juz give that million dollar call & get me thru it!! i really want it sooooo FREAKING BBAAADDDDD! ;(Labels: how wld it be like?, lyfe's nvr fair.. but if it is
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